Tuesday, 13 May 2014

Politician Bashing with Humour

My 70+ friend Noelle never misses the opportunity to take a swipe at politicians.  Today she sent me the gag below about Billy the Bushman which probably isn't too far from the truth.  As you can imagine, politicians are about as popular here as they are everywhere else in the world.

For my OS readers the big push here at the moment is to lift the retirement age (meaning eligibility for an aged pension) to 70.  As an office worker i can see that it would be possible for me to do so and i have threatened that ill still be there when I'm 80.  Their response was that they would put in a ramp.  Given the opportunity id be home right now, playing in my garden and being as self sufficient as possible.  How do you expect a tradesman, manual worker, nurse, cleaner etc. that has worked physically hard all their life and is probably worn out by the time they are 60 to go on another 10 years? What of our strict OH&S rules?  Is a 69 year old expected to be on their feet for a full 8 hr shift, or lift the same weight as a 20 year old?  I can see it being a minefield of regulations and disparities.  How many older people will be made redundant or sacked and end up on job seeker welfare?  Will those that aren't physically capable of working be on disability pensions?


I saw a photo of an older tradesman holding up a sign the other day.  It said "Only a politician who had spent their life behind a desk would come up with a retirement age of 70".  The look on his face made me so sad.

Think politicians, think, not just in the box but left & right & up & down.  I remember when I was studying economic theory (Monetary, Keynesian etc) each system had their pros and cons but none of them worked because the decision makers have other agendas other than economic stability, like staying in power.  Don't do what's right, do what will give me votes.  I thought serving in public office was all about serving the people not yourself.  If there are not enough tax payers to fund the pension then find another income source and give honour to the people who have worked hard, paid their taxes and deserve a few years enjoying themselves (not that the pension is so great that it allows for luxuries, it breadline only).

When the bottom line isn't running in the black there are three things you can do:

1. Increase Income/Sales
2. Decrease Expenses/Overheads
3. Increase productivity & efficiency

I'm not sure where this verbal diarrhoea came from and most people wouldn't think a serious though passed between my ears.  Someone sends me a joke about politicians and all of a sudden my fingers were typing.   I don't expect everyone to agree with me, these are my thoughts and I'm generalising like mad.   Perhaps I am gullible, naive and live in a bubble (as i am often told) but I love and respect our older people.  They don't make a lot of noise but they do have one very powerful tool at their disposal - A VOTE.  They need to use it.

Anyway, have a giggle over Noelle's joke which i guess resonates with me being a country girl.
An old  station hand named Billy was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture in  the outback when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a  cloud of dust.
The driver, a young man in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes,  RayBan® sunglasses and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the old  man, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your  herd, will you give me a calf?"
Billy looks at the young man, who obviously is a yuppie, then  looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why  not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® notebook  computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3® cell phone, and surfs to a  NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an  exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite  that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution  photo.         

The yuppie then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop®  and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany  ...        
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot®  that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an  MS-SQL® database through an ODBC connected Excel® spread sheet with email  on his Blackberry® and, after a few minutes, receives a  response.      

Finally, he prints out a  full-colour, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet®  printer, turns to Billy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and  calves."         

"That's right. Well, you'll be helpin yourself to one of me  calves, then, since you won it fair en square." says  Billy.      

He watches the smartly  dressed yuppie select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as  the man gingerly picks it up & stuffs it into the boot of his  car.
As the  yuppie is carefully brushing the dust & hair off his suit, Billy says,  "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what work you do & where you come  from, will you give me back my  calf?"         

The yuppie thinks about  it for a second, wondering what  this wrinkled up dirt encrusted  uneducated old man could possibly know?    He grins and  then says, "Okay, old fella, why not? I'm a believer in fair  play."

"You're a politician  & you work in Canberra."  says the old timer.              
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but, tell me  how on earth did you guess  that?"          

"No guessing required." answered Billy "You showed up here  even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I  already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars  worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and  you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about  cows, for that matter.  This is a herd of sheep.

Now give  me back my dog."

Thanks Noelle, always good to look at my emails when i get home and find one of yours with a joke to make me laugh.

Thanks for Visiting Living In The Land of Oz


  1. You are not alone in your thought there Lynda. I think that we could start but stripping the fat out of our politicians pay and benefits. I find it so disgusting that they want to increase the pension age and yet many of them will be sitting pretty when they retire. Perhaps we should get rid of the pension scheme for politicians and leave them their own super funds and a pension if that runs out. Then we will see what they propose for the rest of us.

    1. Oh thank goodness Fi, i went to bed last night worrying about putting my thoughts out there. Im not as informed as i should be and so like the rest i take my knowledge from the media knowing that it is biased.

  2. I have to agree about the worldwide popularity of politicians and their stupid schemes. Of course they are all exempt from what they put us through. I have to agree with Fiona and think that our politicians should take a 50% pay cut and give up their benefits. That would likely solve our budget "crisis"!

  3. I wonder if we are not all looking at it all the wrong way. I don't disagree with a word you've said about retirement age and politicians (poli=many and tic=blood sucking parasite after all) but I wonder if the reason we are in the mess we are in is due to outsourcing the "problem" of older people. Hold on, don't bite at me for using the word problem. In some European countries they have Nonna and Nonno move in with the family who then help Mamma to care for the children, reducing the cost of living for older people and the need for childcare for younger ones. There are more hands and many hands make light work to maintain veggie gardens thereby reducing the cost of the families food. If Nonno and Nonna are both able to garden they could in theory grow a tremendous amount of food and with not too much hard physical graft. A garden is hardest to set up and plant out (back bending) or harvest if it's a bulk harvest, but maintaining it on a daily basis is pretty low work in my experience. A wander around, pull a weed or 2 (long handled weed pullers or raised beds to aid older backs) and then Nonna and Mamma in the kitchen bottling up a storm with passata and pasta sauces and other preserving.
    An article which might also make sense and present an answer is this. A little bit radical perhaps but if you had a much smaller country to maintain then maybe the problem wouldn't be such a big one to try and manage and hence less extreme measures than making our hardest workers work even harder and longer could be found.
    Maybe I'm talking crap but I do know that our over governed and overpopulated with politicians country is currently grasping onto a system that just doesn't seem to be quite working. We are borrowing from Peter (those that should be retired) to pay Paul (those that are on the pension). With an aging population I think this plan is on a road to nowhere. :(
    And that is my little rabid spiel for the day. ;) And be grateful I am NOT running for office!

    1. Wouldnt that be great in an ideal world but extended families dont seem to exist these days. Co-habitating with in laws and even our own parents would for most be impossible. Also familes are spread all over the country due to work and other influences. One system, no matter what it is, doesnt fit all circumstances. Certainly we should be encouraging what you are suggesting and i know in my own family, that Mum will never be put in a home. We will all be fighting for who gets her. Though it would require adjustment, we would also love for Rob's Mum to be with us but she is living with his brother in a unit above the garage. This has been an interesting discussion and we all appear to be on the same page.


    Last Nights Budget Report. Oh Dear.

  5. Hi Lynda Just letting you know I have nominate you for a blogging award.

    1. Oh my, that would be my first. Thank You.

  6. I laughed at the farm hand and politician's interaction. Politicians are the same world over :)
    PS/.. I stumbled upon your blog yesterday and saw an old post where you mentioned that you do not have a substantial number of regular visitors/commenters. Well, I guess you have found yourself one all the way from Vienna, Austria. Have a nice evening.....

    1. Thanks for visiting and leaving a comment. Now i get to explore your site as well.


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